I sat down at a table for lunch with my girlfriend. We ordered our sweet teas and began to catch up. I could tell something was wrong from the moment I sat down, but I waited for her to talk. If she wanted to bring it up - she would. Once the small talk was over, she began. Her son was having a baby. He was young, unmarried, unsure. And she was scared, embarrassed, afraid. She was about to become a grandmother to a baby that would be born to a young girl she had never even met. I could dive deep into all the things she felt and shared with me, but I won’t. That’s her story. Suffice it to say…
Rains came.
I sat laughing and giggling with a friend of mine. We shared stories about parenting and marriage and I loved every second of it. But when the moment got quieter, she leaned in. Her countenance changed. Where she had once been laughing, she was now serious, focused. “My son recently came out to me, Melissa. I had no idea. How did I miss it all these years? This changes everything. What do I do?” She has to grieve a life she had dreamt for her son because all of that feels different now. He is different now. I could tell you all the questions she had and all the things she asked, but I won’t. That’s her story. Suffice it to say…
Winds blew.
What is going on with you? If you and I were sitting down for lunch, what would it be that you would bring up to me? Sometimes, when I sit down with people I will ask this question: What is going on in your life that you are so excited about right now? It’s good to ask those you love this question. After all, if they’re excited - don’t you want to be excited with them?? Then I will follow it up with this question: What is going on in your life that is worrying you? After all, if they’re praying about it or staying up late about it or losing sleep over it - don’t you want to know? Don’t you want to help?
So after the pleasantries and the small talk and the laughter, what would you answer? What is keeping you up late at night? What is weighing on your mind 24/7? What is it you’re carrying around that is heavy? What has you going under the water?
You’ve been to hell and back, I’m guessing. You’ve fought some pretty incredible fights. You’ve overcome some things that you never thought you’d overcome. So, why in the heck, do you find yourself back in the trenches again?
Rains came. Winds blew.
That’s why. Because today can be sunny but tomorrow can be horrific. Because death and hurt and grief and anxiety and sickness and disappointment and loneliness rarely ever take a day off. Such is life. Rains come. Winds blow. Trees are uprooted. Lives are forever changed. Hearts are broken.
This Sunday I was put on the schedule to lead worship at church. So two days ago, on Monday morning, I pulled up the order of service to see what songs I would be leading. The song they had me leading was a good one. I was excited to sing it. But I looked at the next song in the order and I immediately picked up my phone and text my Worship Pastor. “Would you switch with me?” I asked him. “I want to sing Firm Foundation. I need to sing Firm Foundation.” And because he is wonderful and he is my friend, he switched with me
This week I have been practicing my song for Sunday. And I must tell you, I get so excited when I begin to sing the bridge.
Rains came, Winds Blew
But my house is built on You
I’m safe with you
I’m gonna make it through
If I told you today that what you are going through sucks…that it is awful…that it is unfair…that I’m mad about it…that it never should have happened…would you believe me? Hopefully you would.
But if I told you that even in the midst of it all, God is still good…would you believe that? Or would that be a harder pill to swallow?
So, let me ask you: What is going on in your life that is worrying you?
Mel
I am almost 70 years old so my view might be outdated. I have been in your friends shoes. I felt shock, fear, anger, and yes excitement for that first grandbaby. Her son's life is not over just hitting a bump in the road. She needs to sit down with him and discuss his plans. Is he with the mother of his child now? What are her plans after the baby? What are his options and future plans? He needs to bring her to meet his family because like it or not you all are now linked together. The wisest woman I ever knew (I called her mom) told me when I was unmarried, pregnant and scared to always remember "This could be so much worse! You could have contracted a fatal disease, have been raped or beaten. Instead we are getting a BABY! a new life to love". Be there for your son, listen to him, offer advice if asked, consider changing your future plans if they need a place to live, be firm with your rules and above all let God guide you as you prepare for the next stage of life.
I worry so much about my marriage. I look at other people's marriages and I want mine to be like that.